Tomorrow is the three week marker for mine and Chris' trip to New York. A few weeks shy of a year since my trip with Jenna. It seems like it was years ago. I came home to a life falling apart. Little did I know, I had to fall and hit bottom before I could become a better person and find who I once was.
Looking back, I know that the events that took place when I got back home had been set in motion years before. It was something that was silently waiting to explode, as things of that nature often do. I fought so very hard not to become a statistic, but over time I've realized that I was looking at it in all the wrong ways.
Here I am, three months shy of turning 28. I had a 7 1/2 year marriage - that was a 10 year relationship - that has been placed behind me, in my tote of "past" baggage. Nearly eight months ago I married a wonderful, loving man with an amazing soul and all I can do is wait in anticipation for the rest of my life with him to unfold. My divorce didn't make me a statistic, it gave me a story. It gave me wisdom. It gave me a whole new outlook on EVERYthing.
My body is twenty years ahead of me, literally. Three years of being without all my "female reproductive organs" has taught me even more about who I will be, who I am becoming, the older me. So many people are always questing to "find themselves", well, I've come to believe that "yourself" finds you. Life is wonderful, no matter how difficult it gets at times, it's all so very worth it.
28... wow. I look in the mirror and I can already see my face changing. Not anything that anyone else would notice, but I can see it. The lines that weren't there before. The glimpses of past heartaches that sometimes shine through in my eyes. I wouldn't change a thing. Love has taken over and God along with time has healed all of my past wounds. Life - its beautiful and the best is yet to come!
It's good that you can look back and not feel the need to change a thing and you can see the blessings from your experiences. I went down a pretty dangerous path for a while. I was emotionally and spiritually wounded and I used alcohol to numb the pain. Getting my life back in order was far more painful but after all that was said and done I am glad that it was painful. that way I will never forget about it.
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