We don't buy no drinks at the bar

we pop champagne cuz we got that dough
let me hear you say aah (aah aah aah aah)
say aah (aah aah aah aah)
go girl, its your birthday
open wide i know your thirsty

jenna put together some drinks-
for her & the boy of her's

She believes she's got it all

she swears the moon don't hang quite as high as it used to and she only sleeps when its raining
and she screams, and her voice is straining and she says baby it's 3am I must be lonely
when she says baby well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes
she says the rain's gonna wash away I believe it
she believes that life is made up of all that you're used to
and the clock on the wall has been stuck at 3 for days, and days

the fact that it's past 3am got the song in my head. i really should be trying to get to sleep right about now, but i'll put it off.. until... until. sleep doesn't come easily to me, it never has, but lately that on top of my sinusitis is kicking my butt. luckily i was able to drop the temp. in the house this morning and actually get some sleep for about three hours. i despise having a stuffy nose. when i lay down it's all that i can think about. i start to focus on swallowing, or my lack of swallowing that is - it's impossible because i have no air flow in my nostrils, thus my mouth is my only form of breathing - once this begins i have the urge to swallow continuously and i end up gasping for air because low and behold when i'm swallowing i'm not breathing! it makes for a hellacious night. now mind you i do suffer from sleep apnea, but at least i'm not aware of that for the most part - it never wakes me up fully anymore.

our rooster... tangible? ohhh yes...
because sometimes i'd like to "touch" him
all right and ring his stinking neck, he's MEAN.

Then you call me, call me in

you think I am your possession, you´re messing with a southern girl
but my recipe is on with your stale bread, yeah it´s hot

why do i start things, but then leave them without finishing?

i rarely ever manage to stick with things. it's depressing however thrilling when i actually stick it out and do what i began to do in the first place. hey, i did get around to finishing my 100 movies in less than a year last year! i told myself i would do it again this year too, but as you can tell that was a huge fail. i never even started. i think i got halfway through the 365 project ... don't even get me started on 100 things, did i even get 10 of them done!?! at least there's not a time limit on it and i can just keep adding...! oh, and my 101 in 1001 days.. yeah, didn't get that done either. why the rambling about all of this? well, i'm at it again.. i want to do a picture meme for each day of the week. obviously i won't do it every day, but i'd like to do it at least a few times a week! i also want to cook a different recipe each night for the entire month of june.

1. Macro Monday
2. Tangible Tuesday
3. Words of Wednesday
4. Thirsty Thursday
5. F???? Friday
6. S???? Saturday
7. Soulful Sunday

BTW, did i ever mention that i now have all the parts to my nikon D70? i'm so in love! ♥

Sinking

i need to find some inner peace. quick.

"As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world - that is the myth of the 'atomic age' - as in being able to remake ourselves." - Gandhi

i feel like i'm being eaten alive - so much discontentment. anger. annoyance. i'm that rug on everyone's floor that they keep wiping their feet on and i'm tired of it. wayd is the only person (excluding parents of course) in my life right now who hasn't been either walking all over, abandoning me or simply putting everyone else first. i feel like i do my best to drop whatever i'm doing when others need help... why is it that no one ever wants to help me? what i hate worse though is when i'm made to feel like an unwanted obligation. i fight every single day to get out of bed. my body hurts so bad some mornings that it's a struggle to breathe, seriously even my TOES hurt on a daily basis, but i "grit my teeth" and deal with it. i feel like i always have the weight of the world on my shoulders, but yet, no matter what - if someone needs me i'm there with bells on.